A Grumpy Big Sister

This is a memory from the time when I was five.

In the summer, I visit my maternal grandmother’s house with my mother and little brother. Though I have been to my grandmother’s place many times, this is the first time I go there with my brother. Everything feels exciting when we are together, I think to myself as the three of us get on the bullet train and seat ourselves by one of the windows. My mother takes out snacks for us, and immediately, a party begins for me and my brother.

Once we arrive at the house, everybody at home greets us at the entrance. Among them is my elder cousin, whom I always look forward to meeting. I still remember the fun memories from the last time when she played with me.

Today, however, her attention immediately goes to my brother. “My sweetling!” she cries out, totally unaware that I am also standing next to him. “Look at you, you cute little thing!”

All others’ attention also seems to shower on my brother. No surprise, this is his first visit, I tell myself. He should get the spotlight.

But my brother continues to monopolize everybody’s attention even at dinner table. Even my aunt, who dropped by to meet us, seems to be busy pampering my brother.

This is about when I start wondering if I have gone out of fashion. If so, how? The last time I was here by myself, I clearly remember I was the centre of everybody’s attention. And I do not think I have changed that much since then.

On top of this unsettling thought, I am now also slightly annoyed that people are all over my brother, making it hard for me to grab his attention, too.

Perhaps because of all these, I spend the rest of the evening being a rather grumpy big sister.